Super Heroes
I have donned the cape of Middle Aged Man for the last time. Last Sunday ended my run with the “Lesser Known Super Heroes”. I will no longer fight crime next to Poultry Man, Accordion Man and Sopapilla Woman. It’s not likely I’ll be that missed. I think this crime-fighting band has come out of the shadows of secrecy only five times over the last ten years, and that was only to publicize church picnics.
None of them really have any “super powers”, although Sopapilla Woman, wearing a protective oven mitt, does throw really hot cinnamon and sugar encrusted sopapillas at criminals with pretty uncanny accuracy.
I didn’t really want this to end; but, a friend, after our most recent performance mentioned that 55 is pushing the boundaries of middle age. I realized in that moment that my season in the sun was over and that someone younger would need to take my place.
I’ve been thinking about why we’ve done this bit all these years. It gets more embarrassing each time, as the tiny super hero tee-shirts reveal more and more…well middle-agedness. We frighten both newcomers and children alike.
But I have come to understand we never existed just to publicize picnics but maybe to promote a way of life with each other. We are each leaders in our church. And so we are teaching a whole bunch of convictions every time we stumble out in front of our family. Here are just three of probably six-hundred-some:
*Dignity does not come from dressing up in formal clothing. We look silly and undignified. But we were never supposed to pretend to be any different than the people we serve. There is no clergy-laity separation in our convictions. Over the years I have discovered that I have received incredible respect, dignity, honor, permission and trust, mostly by never pretending I was someone above or apart from them. Influence is never achieved by a title or position, but only through being authentic, faithful and genuine enough to be trusted. Any time we can take off the robe of religious superiority with our own vulnerability, self-directed humor, and commonness, people flock to open their hearts and give permission.
*Church can be the most winsomely fun and enjoyable place in town. We are convinced God absolutely delights in laughter and playful joy. Joy has to be given expression. I really believe God probably gathers His angels around on occasion and says, “You gotta watch this. These guys are funny.” Reverence is not a pious voice or a solemnly quiet room. Reverence is when God is lifted up in all of who He is. We can teach a false and stupid dichotomy. We laugh and enjoy all week long and then we come to church and suddenly we can stage something melodramatically serious, piously trite or manipulatively condemning. It really is possible for there to be tears, repentance, communion, worship…and raucous laughter in the same morning. It’s all who God has made us to be. Cool God.
*An environment of health and grace celebrates. As I looked out at my friends last Sunday, it was so beautiful. We are all hurting, grieving over something. We’re afraid and concerned about twenty things. But for five minutes a family got to celebrate that love wins, that grace wins, that Jesus wins. That His life in us transcends and trumps the cynicism and despair of our culture. Everyone in that audience last Sunday was hooting and hollering and laughing in joy, shouting to us spontaneous blurts of mock offense. Even the most pious, stoic newcomer was compelled to smile, and drink in the infectious joy. The moment wonderfully models and teaches an environment of grace. Such who come under its delight, learn to no longer live a double life: one of pretend moral togetherness on Sunday and mortal inconsistencies and guilt the rest of the week.
I donned the cape for the last time Sunday. But I pray that, like the Dread Pirate Roberts of Princess Bride, another Middle Aged Man is waiting in the wings. I pray that one Sunday morning, a few years from now, sitting in the audience, I will be surprised by the sudden loudness of the theme from Batman as the Super Heroes emerge from the crowd and another Middle Aged Man begins delivering lines. That’s when I’ll know my work here is done.
Hear, hear.
Certainly there’s room for some sort of mentorship, or transition? Like Star Trek: Generations?? You could do an awesome death scene, have a touching handing-over of the reins, and everything. It would be epic.
In an age where it is difficult to find authentic mentors, I am especially grateful for the lesser superheroes’ example.
Seriously. And, it looks like with my next birthday I will be entering into Middle Age.(…is that even possible? Haven’t they moved that to 40 yet?) I’m glad I’m female and in Atlanta so I don’t have to be the one to whom you pass the torch on this one, but I wait on pins and needles to find out who the chosen one will be.
John…
…and did you know that the Dread Pirate Roberts first name was Wesly
…you didn’t know I was in the movies did you?
…well, now you know
…from the Dread Pirate Wesly Roberts I
As one who is firmly planted in middle age, I would love to hear you teach on dealing with the effects therein. I struggle a lot with 1) all those wasted years 2) the incredible lack of accomplishment up until now 3) the failures that are rampant in my life now because of life choices made in the past that can never be reversed, only redeemed and 4) trying to find hope for the few remaining years I have. So much disappointment, unfulfilled dreams, and smaller expectations for the future.
I was sitting in my den, by the fireplace, with Rusty, my faithful old dog resting by my feet, when I heard the alarm go off. “Zounds,” I cried, “A lesser known hero needs my help.” Rusty groaned and slid comfortably back into his nap, but I quickly donned the costume of Very Senior Man then rushed to the computer to send a reply to the troubled Middle Aged Man. What I had to tell him in words that even he could understand, is that Lesser Known Hero’s cannot simply quit – it’s not done and for good reason. Age really has nothing to do with it, MAM (Middle Aged Man). To parahrase Steinbeck and The Grapes of Wrath, where ever there are picnics to support, you will be there. Where ever there are congregationists who need a laugh, you will be there. We’ll find you in silly scripts and in laugh-laden sketches. You will be in the foyer, in the church office, on the stage in the auditorium and you will be found online at ODF.org. You and the other Lesser Known Heroes are needed MAM, so long as you can don a cutoff superhero shirt. So, buck up, my younger counterpart, and suck up that exposed and ample middle-aged belly and get on with your work. The picnic today was a great success. Very sorry you could not be there. But the record attendance should tell you how much you are still needed. Call me anytime when you need more encouragement, MAM. When you beome like me, a Very Senior Man, then you can retire from the Lesser Known Hero group. Now, Rusty, out of my chair and let me sink my old bones back into my recliner.
I got to wondering about dignity, and its source. Merriam-webster.com says it’s “the quality or state of being worthy, honored, or esteemed.”
2 Cor. 16 & 17 says “So from now on we regard (or recognize) no one from a worldly point of view, according to the flesh. Even though we once knew Christ in this way, we now do so no longer.”
Even as we are learning ourselves in a new way- our identity & union with Christ- we learn others in the same manner- they too have a true identity separate from their flesh, in their union with Christ. The truth about them is that because of Christ living in, as, and through them, they are worthy, and we can honor and esteem them. We can extend the same grace- and dignity- to them that we have received, and are allowing ourselves.
Hey John, I don’t think you’re off the hook quite yet. I just read a quote that applies to your situation. “60 is the youth of old age!” Which means, you’re still middle aged for another 5 years.
What fun it is to celebrate life and God’s joy with you and those in the Body of Christ. Thanks for who you are and who you allow others to be.